you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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