Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Found your dick twin last night
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
