I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Randomize
