i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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