sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Randomize
