I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
You ate ashes out of my bong
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
