i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
so explain again why im purple
no
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
