just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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