the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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