I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
