bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
ttyl tear gas
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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