Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
