Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
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