does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
