was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I'm really busy with my period
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize