forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
