Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Barsexuality is the new black.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Randomize
