You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
