The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
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