Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
