i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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