Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
