why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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