I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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