it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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