He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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