Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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