Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Randomize
