Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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