oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Randomize
