yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
