you guys were way drunker than both of me
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
