I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
