I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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