Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
