Don't make out with my wife yet
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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