I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Randomize
