you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
