It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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