I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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