we have officially lost it.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
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