Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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