How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Randomize
