but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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