I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
NoShamevember. You game?
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
