When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize