i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
