it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
