Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
