I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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